Professional Success

Where is the source of success in professional life located?
Why are some people professionally more successful than others?
Why does one person can be easily trusted to lead the project, and the project will be successful, at three same time with the other person the project will fail?
Why some people are paid better that the other ones?

What is the root of the situation?

Bert Hellinger, the author of the family constellations method, gave us such an aphorism: “Success has the the face of the mother.” During many family constellations sessions it’s been often observed that a person is doing in the work the way he/she treats the mother. For many this is quite unexpected. People are looking for the causes of their problems elsewhere: no luck with the boss, the wrong profession, the work is not interesting, coincidence, need more education, and so on. Hellinger said that in order to understand whether a person will bring the project to its success or will let it fail, you should look at his/her relationship with the mother.
Attitude towards the mother – it is an inner state, which you can work with, even if the mother is not around. To begin try to ask yourself a few questions:
Am I trying to solve for my mother her personal problems?
Am I trying to save my mother?
Am I trying to parent my mother?
Also you can close your eyes, imagine your mother in front of you and feel how far you are from her. Can you make a move towards her? A person, who takes the mother the way she is, feels a deep inner happiness, he/she knows when and what step has to be taken in life. This is exactly what helps him/her take right directions in the professional life (and not only). Here are a few examples of how the attitude towards the mother affects the success at work:
If a person successfully starts a project, but then loses the interest, even though everything was going well at the beginning, – it often has to do with the so-called “interrupted movement” towards the mother. This happens if the person as a child was separated from the mother for some time, especially at an early age. It also may be the reason why the person is not well-paid, shows no initiative or has lots of demands towards others.
If a person does not respect the boss, it is often because he does not respect the mother. Not having learned to respect his/her mother, the person will not be able to respect other people. If a person believes that the way his mother lives her life is wrong, if he/she tries to teach her how she should live, such a person begins to do exactly the same to his/her boss and clients. The quality of the work drops. Explaining does not help, because the root of the problem remains without changes.

The reasons of the above are often located in the person’s family system. They might be related to the circumstances of the person’s own life and the situations that occurred before the person was born (in the mother’s generation and earlier). Often the circumstances are traumatic. This unresolved traumatic event is the root causing today’s problems. Constellations work by Bert Hellinger’s help in dealing with such past traumatic events. Each person has his/her own circumstances. In the process of working, these circumstances are revealed, and the person gets the opportunity to rebuild his/her life.

Elena Nesterenko, Constellations – Practical Workshops
www.constellations.work/workshops | (647) 367-6073