From your emptiness you can only give emptiness.

Natural Givers

Lots of people, when giving, are actually looking to take, because they are empty. This is often very confusing at the beginning and traumatic after, because it looks like they are ready to give, but they actually only manipulate you and when the moment is right they start not taking but grabbing from you, and they are often very demanding. So, if you are a “natural giver”, you are actually a hidden taker, you grab energy from the people around you.

Natural Takers

Natural takers are less confusing. They simply look like little children right away, always ready to take. They do not even pretend to give anything.

Who are They?

Who are they, those givers and takers? They are never grown people, who just look like adults. Or they are children, who are never children (they look like adults when they are children). Both types are easily overwhelmed in very simple and natural everyday situations.

When do You Start Giving Naturally?

You can only start giving naturally if you have yourself fulfilled with energy or love completely so you simply cannot hold it anymore, it runs over to the people and life around you.

Bert Hellinger About Giving, Taking and Balance

Bert Hellinger, the originator of the family constellations method, says in his books that we take from our mother first. Through her we receive our father and from both our parents we receive the whole life after. This is how we receive our happiness, success, knowing where to go in life, our health, our strength. All this was seen during many family constellations sessions. Hellinger teaches us to take our parents just the way they are, without expecting them to be different. This is how we become balanced. This is how we know how to give and how to take. What was completely new to me in Hellinger’s books, is that givers are the ones, who destroy relationships, and givers put themselves in a higher position than other people, and givers do not respect other people.

Elena Nesterenko – Family & Systemic Constellations
Method by Bert Hellinger
Family Constellations Workshops in Toronto

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