Love, Happiness, Dignity, Energy, Parents

There are “things” that we need from the people around us.
Man-Woman
For example, a woman is looking for a man, or a man is looking for a woman. And the world around us (the people around us) is the right place to search for him/her. If a woman is not looking for a man in the people around her, this means the place of a man near her is already taken. How? The same way as usual, either she has (or had) a relationship, or she might be tied to some situations in her family past, or she might be her father’s daughter, so she actually does not need a man. The same applies to the men.
Also there are “things” that we often search in the people around us, but this is not the place where we can find them:

-Love
-Happiness
-Dignity
-Energy
-Even our parents
Bert Hellinger in his books says that people do not often realize that our parents are within us already. There is no need to search somewhere else. Addicted people, for example, they often search for something in this world that might fulfill their need in the father’s love (or to say more right, they miss that connection to the father). Unhappy people might miss that connection to the mother. Hellinger gives an example of Buddha, who’ve been searching for Nirvana. Hellinger says that this was actually Buddha’s mother, who he missed, because she died when he was little. About dignity – we also can search for it in the people around us, expecting them to respect us so we feel that self-respect. This does not work. Whatever is already in us we cannot fulfill from the people around us. Neither happiness, nor self-respect, nor self-love etc. All of this is to search in us without putting any expectations on the people around.